This essay was written by Andrii Yurchenko, age 23, from Ukraine in response to the 2023 Global Voices Essay Contest in Central and Eastern Europe. Andrii was awarded first place for this entry.

War. It is the worst kind of thing that humanity has ever created. Though it's only natural, I suppose, for people to get into conflict, an argument, fight each other, or start wars. Yes, it all goes back to our primal instincts, to those times when we tried to survive no matter the cost… But shouldn't we evolve, make the world a better place for everyone, and, thus, prosper ourselves? After all, we do live in the age of wonders. Every day a new technology, breakthrough, or invention comes to life. I say we must be better! We can't let fear, arrogance, and greed win over truth, kindness, and justice. The light will prevail over the darkness, we will win this fight! In this essay, I'd like to share with you some stories of me and my family living through russia's war in Ukraine. You will learn about the experiences, laughter and tears, and resilience that regular people discover in them when facing extreme situations.

My name is Andrii. I am from the town of Romny. It is located in the Sumy region that borders russia. It was here where it all began for me - the russian full-scale invasion. 6 A.M. on the clock: "Andrii, wake up! Wake up, son!" - It was my dad. -"Hmm…what… what's going on, dad?" - "The war has begun!" - I reacted instantly: "What, how, when?!" Millions of questions were rushing through my head. I thought my dad was joking.

Well, no, he wasn't. We went, like everyone else, to get the essential supplies: gas for the car, water, basic food. I was thinking at that moment about how my grandparents reacted to the news and whether they were okay. 7:13 A.M.: my parents came back from the gas station. My mom was really upset, I asked her what happened, she burst into tears, then I heard it: my grandpa died. The shock from the news of the war starting and his poor health took its toll. We went to my grandparents' town to bury him, to Trostyanets. It was a horrifying war zone in Trostyanets for the first month, as it was occupied by russian troops until it was freed by the Ukrainian military and the russians went to the same place as did the russian warship. We buried my grandpa very quickly, without all the proper rituals, as we didn't have the time. Exiting the cemetery, we saw a russian convoy driving in our direction. They stopped about 500 meters away from us. Later that day, we saw approximately four russian convoys going into the town. We spent the night there, and the next day we took my grandma and left for my town, which is about 150 km from this town. In fact, we were fortunate to get to Romny alive, as on the same road, in the same place, a few hours after we left Trostyanets, a civilian car had been shelled by a russian tank. The most challenging part of this war so far, for my family and me, was the first weeks. During this time, we heard a lot of explosions, especially in Trostyanets, experienced the rapid death of my grandpa, for which I blame russia and only russia, and tried to take in all the mental and real-life terror we saw, read and heard about. After the first five days, I started to adjust and got better. It was much more difficult for my mom and grandma.

To be frank, these days, I am always afraid. Afraid I won't survive this war, afraid rascist (russians fascists) will win, but most of all, I am afraid of my family members dying or being killed. However, by going through these challenges, learning, and overcoming them, I have become much stronger mentally, and my willpower has increased immensely. In fact, I prepared my family's home for the most challenging winter we've ever faced. We now have satellite internet and a gas generator; thus, we can have electricity and internet despite any circumstances. I set this up thanks to my job of tutoring English. I've been working a lot there during the war. It helps to switch my focus. The thing that actually helps me the most is discipline. I always plan my next day in advance. I do my best to stick to my schedule and, at the same time, not overwork myself. It gives me a lot of pleasure to complete the task and then put a green "check" next to it. It motivates me to do the next task, and then the next, and the next.

Last but definitely not least, I firmly believe that it is crucial to share your pain with others. You know, those who will listen. This strategy has helped my family and me immensely recently. Being at home all the time, working non-stop, and having missiles flying above you will make anyone's mood a bit moody. Thus, sharing is, indeed, caring.

It is a difficult time for all of us no matter where we are in the world, for some more, for some less. As one prominent Ukrainian historian said: "People have always lived in conditions of fear, stress, depression. However, there always were some things that changed everything for the better." So we must persevere, and with time the light will win over the darkness.